I’m not the smartest cookie in the box. I consider myself to have above average intelligence… by a hair. But what I do believe I have, is a firm grasp on my strengths and weaknesses. But I didn’t always.
I did the MLM thing – for far too long. And I didn’t do it like a lot of people do – throwing a party here and there and maybe growing a team of a dozen + women. Nope, I went full fledged MLM. I had thousands on my team, won a free cruise at some point, and had a few days where I made $5k in one day. But, I put in thousands and thousands more than I’d ever see back and thousands upon thousands of hours. If I broke it down over the years, I’d be lucky to get paid 1985’s minimum wage.
But I believed it was amazing. I got caught up and took people with me. I believed in what I was doing. I believed in it because i heard over and over again that I could do it. And the high’s were amazing. But I saw a quote recently that really defined the experience for me.
“If it does not open. It’s not your door.”
We looked at opportunities, at life, like passageways, hallways, and doors waiting to open. When one door closes, another one opens. But it doesn’t always, does it? And in that moment, everything became clear to me. If it does not open, it’s not your door.
I spent years and years trying to open the network marketing door but it wasn’t my door. The entire time, I thought it was me – something wrong with what I was doing. So I went to every marketing and sales seminar I could get my hands on, watched videos, listened to cd’s, webinars – name it, I did it. I added it up and it came out to over 10,000 hours of sales and marketing training. Yet, I had very little to show for it. Where did I go wrong?
I was trying to open the door that wasn’t mine. But, more than that – I was listening to advice from the experts. Ok, I’ll rephrased that – I was listening to every advice from every expert. Be aggressive, don’t be aggressive. 3 foot rule, 6 foot rule, throw the rule out the door. Be natural, emulate others, be the expert, don’t be the expert, be humble, be confident – you guys get it, you’ve heard it.
But it wasn’t until I realized that what works for the goose doesn’t work for the gander. (Hey, I told you I wasn’t the smartest cookie in the box) I had to do my own thing. And I could do my own thing and take what worked for others.
Something happens to a lot of marketing and sales people when they get so much experience under their belt, they want to start teaching others the ‘secrets’ and make millions doing it. And they do. Then people like myself spend the money to attend the trainings. Of course, these individuals will disguise it by saying they want to help others achieve the same success and just pass on the knowledge but changes are they just enjoy the limelight.
Been there. Done that.
Does that mean you shouldn’t attend? No! You should. There are some great training out there that really helps. And when you’re in sales, you get knocked down a lot. These seminars are fantastic for bringing you back up and motivating you. But the biggest lesson I learned from the biggest mistakes I’ve made is that we should take it with a grain of salt. There’s no secret. There’s no great answer. But, if something they say makes sense and you know it applies to you, then use it. But when they tell you to change everything and what you’re missing is not being you and you need to follow every.single.thing.they.do.and.say. – then run. Fast.
Does that mean you shouldn’t do Network Marketing? Remember, you and I don’t have the same doors and the same keys.
Start with some free YouTube videos. And don’t forget, separate the good from the bad. Make sure you don’t lose yourself and be critical of when they say what you need to do is attend all their trainings and books. They are salespeople after all. 😉 Here are some videos to start with. Let me know what you think!
Science of Persuasion
5 Ways to Listen Better
Your Body Language